ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
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