You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Randomize
