im drinking this country out of the recession.
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
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