No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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