Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Randomize
