That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
