this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
