I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
