Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
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