turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
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