her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
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