Me too!
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
