called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
3 2 1 whiskey
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
