Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
