Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
