yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
Randomize
