And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
