hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize