its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I'm just crazy horny about you
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize