Sponge bath it is.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
Randomize
