I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize
