he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
