I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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