vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Is Oprah even human
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
His nipple licking is glorious
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
