Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
