we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Randomize
