I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
