Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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