Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Randomize
