I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
