If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
Randomize