I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
