I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
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