Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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