I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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