She went from zero to smokin in five shots
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
