Where is the hickey?
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
Randomize
