i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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