in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
