New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
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