so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize