Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(917): View more from New York City

new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms

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(503): View more from Oregon

what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.

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(323): View more from California

She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.

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(321): View more from Florida Space Coast

I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.

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(970): View more from Colorado

I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.

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(402): View more from Nebraska

Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?

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(903): View more from Texas

I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is

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(858): View more from California

It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.

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