I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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