Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Randomize
