i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize