I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
pray to the hookup gods
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize
