I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
