The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
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