these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
Randomize
