lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
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